Sunday, May 10, 2009

Happy Mother's Day

I love being a mom! It's one of the most rewarding things a woman can be in her life. I really believe these words, but why do I feel so worn down and not so um NOT rewarded? hmmm Well, it's Mother's Day, and my wonderful husband decides that he and the kids will take me out for Mother's day breakfast. We also have family in town so they came with us to celebrate their lovely mom as well. First we got started a little late, so breakfast turned into brunch, no big, except we're all starving and kids are getting cranky! We head to Cracker Barrel, and I swear it must be the token restaurant for Mother's Day! There were people every where! Cars were backed up to the entrance, and I'm thinking, "Why are these people all still here?" It took us like two seconds to realize we didn't want to wait two more hours to eat. You sit there watching all these people mosey out the front door, rubbing their over-stuffed tummies, belching and sucking on toothpicks. By that time, just the simple rocking in the hardback rocking chairs, starts making you sick! I mean seriously, once we went there for Mother's Day, we had to wait so long, I started to eat one of those wooden golf tees from the triangle game! When someone passed by, I pretended it was a giant toothpick. But that's between you and me.

Anywho, we decided to go over to Bob Evans. We only had a 15 minute wait, but I tell you, when your baby is screaming because they're hungry, and your arm feels like the muscles will snap from the load of your precious little child, slinging their sweet heavy little head backwards so hard to can take your nose off your face, 15 minutes might as well be an hour, and right at that moment, Mother's Day didn't feel so "happy"!

We sit down and balloon man comes over, yes I said a BALLOON man! He starts making all these bubble animals and weapons for my kids. My baby doesn't understand why she doesn't get one, and starts grabbing at the other little girl's balloon at the table. I look over, and she's chewing on the thing! You have to understand that I hate balloons! They are festive, and beautiful, but in the hands of a two year old, they are horrid! They screech so loud, and I know any minute they will explode and burst my eardrums! (This fear comes from when I was a teen, I helped with one of those wood cut out picture spots at an Easter fair. I was being the bunny and a little girl got in the egg part and her balloon exploded on my cheek and my ear when she was getting in!) Needless to say, I was tense!

We finally gets some bread and crackers for the kids, and they bring two of my kid's food, about 20-30 minutes before everyone else's?? Weird! They were done, and stuffed and ready to leave. I got my food, baby wants my eggs, I give her a plate, younger son wants eggs, I give him some, oldest son is grabbing bacon, now baby is crying, grabs paper menu to throw, I go to grab it, get a paper cut between my fingers!! OUCH!

Baby's oatmeal finally comes out. SOOO overcooked and slimy! Just paid $3 for a cup of untouched goo, that nobody wants. I start to eat my french toast, baby is grabbing again, turn away from her so I can eat, my hair gets all in my syrup. Baby is super whiny now, and I am past ready to leave. I get up take the kids to the car. We decide to go with our visiting family to the mall, but my baby is crying because I brought her a juice cup, not a bottle. So I run into Target for a bottle and milk, determined to try to have a good rest of the day, come out, our baby, and the other two babies are our cold! So we go home, just spent money on milk and bottles we have at home. It was kind of funny. I was ready for a nap, but didn't get one. It's 12am and I am still up. I love being a mom.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Merry Crack-mas

We were driving down the road, and there it was, a great big blinking sign, "Holiday Time in the Park" or something like that. So my youngest son starts bouncing up and down in his seat yelling "we have to go! PLEASE Mom PLEASE!" "Sounds like a fun time" I say. We'll see. I check the clock, 4:30, the neighborhood kids will be out and about still, but I HAVE to go home to change the baby, take some Advil, and recoop before I attempt something like that. I grab my laptop to find out what the "Holiday" party will be like. Games and refreshments, face painting, horse rides. Just bring canned food. I go to the pantry, only a couple dented cans of peas, yuck! "I should just throw those out" I think. So I grab the canned fruit and bag it. Out the door we go.

I call my husband, give him a heads up, and an hour later we are all standing in front of the traffic police waiting to cross the busy road to the festivities. Someone doesn't see the police officer swinging his lighted baton madly in the air for him to stop, and he gets in trouble! This is horrible, but inside, I thought it was neat to see the police officer reprimand a grown man like a child. (I know it's sick, just being honest)

So we're safely across the road, and into the madness we go. People were swarming around the gazebo. We fight through the crowd and end up at the little craft table with home made goods from the seniors for charity. Not what I'm looking for, I don't even have a dollar on me. We want the free refreshments, because hubby hasn't eaten, and I am trying to keep the peace. We turn around on the VERY narrow side walk and make our way back the way we came to find the red food coloring-laced punch, and cookies. So we hand over our canned goods in exchange for the poison and sugar. (OK OK over exaggerating here) Cookies and punch in hand, and our arms pasted to our sides like Barney, we start to manoeuvre our way back through the crowd.

Santa Baby is playing through the speakers. People are running around, trees all through the park are lit and beautiful. Kids have glow sticks and balloon animals. Plenty of people are lined up at every food stand, ready to pay four times what the food is worth, (I almost paid $4 for a rice crispy treat, but I put my $5 back in my pocket and bought something I needed later) There had to be over fifty people lined up for the horse ride. It is about this time that Leader "Such 'n Such" gets up to tell everyone who put the whole thing together, and people applause. The "big" tree is lit, and everyone cheers. I am looking around to find which tree, EVERY tree in the park was covered in lights!

Then a few minutes later the horrifying sound of a VERY slow-moving, screaming fire truck splits through the laughter of the children, and pierces my eardrums. Over the intercom, "Who could this be folks, but the one and only, "Santa Clause"! Line up kids, for your chance to see Santa. I felt like an alien. What were we doing there? We didn't belong. It is at this moment that I realize there is not one mention of the Saviour, Jesus any where in this place. My heart is heavy now, and all I want to do is get my family back home. My kids are sorely disappointed! There is no more face painting, they ran out of balloons for the balloon animals, and there really was nothing planned for the kids. So we go back to the police crossing, and there is traffic flying and no police officer to be found. We finally make it back across the street and head home.

I have to go out to the store after all that, and I'm kind of glad to, just to have a small break. So I drop the family off, and head back out to "Buy-Some-Holiday Cheer-Land". I decide to leave the radio off, the noise does not suit my mood tonight. I need to feel the peace of God.

I get out, smile at the bell-ringer, and ask about her day, she is cold, and on to the buggies I go. I pick up some Advil for my aches and pains, and go to the school supplies and craft area, my favorite! I pick up some paper, and I'm about to be on my way, when a young guy asks me for a quarter, "I gave mine to the lady out front, I'm sorry" (This isn't actually true, I DID give my last two quarters to the lady out front, of Michaels, not Walmart)

I decide I need to leave. For some reason, I'm teetering on the edge of tears this night. I go to the garden center to check out. I am behind three other people. All women, all three have cell phones attached to their ears. None interacting with the others.

The stuffiness of all the decorations and garb, threatens further burden my soul. I look at the young lady in front of me. She is holding a small collection of tree trimmings. Meek though they are, I imagine what her heart is feeling right at that moment. Pride in knowing that she will go home, and have her very own tree. I thought back to my first year as a young bride, our sweet little tree, in our one bedroom apartment. It was very special to me. My heart warmed toward this young girl. I silently prayed for her. The cashier was so kind and happy. Ahh finally, a joyful soul.

I walked out of Walmart, smiled at the lady guarding the door, and told her to have a good night. I pass two ladies loading their car. One is telling the other (in a very loud rude voice) about her husband telling her to "stretch the Christmas and grocery money" and how "she ain't stretchin' nothin', he'd better find a way to get some more **** money!" My heart just broke. I don't know their situation, but it is an example of every sitcom marriage, and sadly most (maybe not all to that extreme) in our society, that displays the blatant disrespect women have for their husbands, their children's father. Men have no leadership in their homes any more. How can they be expected to lead spiritually, when we are fed this garbage-model, from every show that airs. And ladies, we laugh at it, and buy into it. Of course it's funny, or they wouldn't hook us on it! The bible does warn us against "coarse jesting". I have to remind myself that I am not immune to absorbing some of it, for future use. What we put into our hearts and minds, will come out some time later.

I spoke to the poor guy struggling under the weight of fifty plus buggies, and decided that the reason Christmas is broken, is because this world is broken. If we are too afraid to even smile at each other in the grocery line, and hide behind the very small shelter of our cell phones and refuse to even make eye contact with any one, how will joy of our Saviour spread through our nation? We use these tiny devices as a shield to ward off any human contact that might occur.

We can boast, every service we go to, and all the things we are involved in, to help our kids understand that Christ is the reason we have Christmas, but we are one force in their lives, against a million more that are now, and are to come. Remember, there are other people and other children we need to help to get their minds wrapped around this wonderful thing God has for them.
We MUST step out side of ourselves friends, and become the movement the Lord intended us to be.

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. God's blessings to you.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

November 26th (another late post)

The day before Thanksgiving. We really don't have any where to go for Thanksgiving, so my husband and I decide, “who says, we have to eat turkey and all the sides, lets have pizza for Thanksgiving” We think the kids will LOVE this idea, but it did not go over well. So today I am going to the grocery store and get what we need for a traditional meal, and “we'll just do this whole thing on Sunday, it won't matter what day we eat the meal”

I wake up to my husband telling me the dog pooped on the living room carpet (probably next to the vomit spot, I imagined) and he cleaned it up. Great. I am not an animal person at all! So this just sickened me! And I am GREATLY surprised be cause our dog NEVER does anything in the house!

I get up and go on about my day. I tell the kids to get dressed, we're going to the store before everyone else gets there and we run into “buggy traffic” over by the pumpkin pies and frozen turkeys. Just then, there's a knock at my door. We all know who it is by the knock. It's the neighbor girl. Out of school and all ready to spend the next eight hours at our house playing, (or as I like to call it, arguing about nearly everything) and eating three meals plus snacks with us. Now I truly do love this little girl, but I wasn't sure if I was up to the challenge for the day, and I told her we were going to the store, and she had to go home. Well, she started crying, saying she was so bored there, and her grandmother works third shift, so she really had no one to talk to. I lay down three basic rules, and tell her to ask if she can ride along. And OF COURSE nobody said no. So I'm off to the store, now with one more child. I have one with the list, one walking with me, one in the buggy and the other pushing that. Well four items into the trip my youngest son gets the ol Achilles tendon buggy slap! D-R-A-M-A!!! Right in front of the frozen turkeys! So I move all the juice out of the way and help him into the cart, because apparently he is now crippled. He has serious smell aversions, so as we're back tracking past the laundry soap-smelling fish counter, we all gag, and I am seriously worried about my injured child vomiting on my groceries! Hurry, hurry, hurry!! Finally we escape the vile offence to our nostrils, but not without first drawing the attention of everyone on the back half of the store. Three kids, shouting about “that nasty smell, EWW” does not go unnoticed!

After having collected all the groceries on my list, and the kids managing to collect two of every coupon dispensed in the store, we were headed out the store, when I see the movie box rental. So I stop to get a movie for the kids to watch while I fix lunch/breakfast, and unpack the groceries. That was an ordeal. So we bring home Sonic the Hedge Hog. We leave the store but not without someone having to use the potty first.

We get home, the dog is still in the kitchen, so the groceries go into the living room for now. Kids all in, great! Everyone gets a mini cupcake for now. I get everything unpacked, kids fed a real meal, and try to relax. I still have a headache by the way.

My friend calls and wants to drop a little gift off her kids had for mine. I stand at the door for a moment talking with my body in the door to keep the dog from running out, but he comes shooting through jamming his face through my legs and takes off! I am furious!!!!! My youngest son takes off across the street and down the road after him. Here comes my other son and the neighbor girl running after him, leaving no one inside with the baby. My friend runs in while I get my children collected, and offers to stay while I go get the mutt, or for me to let her, since my head was pounding. I hop in her car, back out of the driveway, and there he comes. I pull back in, and he runs into my neighbor girl's fenced in back yard. I trap him in, and grab his collar, . He was mad, and pulled against me all the way home. I sayand drag him all the way across the street and boot him into the back yard! I say goodbye to my friend and thank her.

Later on I had to make a simple phone call. So I let my kids know, and ask them to keep an eye on the baby, so I can make the call before business hours are over. Well son #1 goes to potty, and son #2, tries to do as I ask, and put the movie in, so they could keep busy for a moment. But he can't find the movie, and starts screaming over and over for me. So loud that he scared the baby, so now she's crying, he's still yelling for me because I couldn't respond, because by this time, someone was on the other end of the line, now hearing all of this. I get upset, and go slam the door shut on the tv center “No more tv!”, and the glass shatters!! “What have I done” I thought. I grab the baby, put her in her high chair, send my son into the kitchen to sit, and I start cleaning up the glass. It is about this time, dad gets home, carrying two pizzas for supper, and we all sit down to eat, and all is calm, Yay dad!! Later on my husband finds the DVD player open...ahhh now I understand how the glass broke.

Tuesday November 25th (another late post)

I woke up today with ANOTHER headache! I guess after sleeping cramped up against my headboard with a baby's head under my neck, or teetering on the edge of the mattress with her little feet up in m ribs, probably has a little something to do with my spinal health.

I decide today I will work with my son on his penmanship. He is not happy about it, and this is about where the struggle begins. My head is pounding and my defence weakens quite rapidly! Thankfully a friend of mine asked to take the boys for a while today. I had everyone ready, and I was getting myself together, and my precious little offspring comes into the kitchen as quiet and innocent as you please, with doody all up her back! I decide I can't change her lying down, so I start the process while she is still standing. It is at this time, that my younger son comes into the kitchen and starts to gag uncontrollably! I start yelling, “Go save yourself!!” He jumps the gate, but it's too late. He throws up on the living room carpet! So I finish cleaning the baby, then washing out her clothes, and on to the living room carpet I go! My friend came about two seconds after I finished all this, and I got ready to take my hubby over to pick his car up from the mechanic.

So a little over a month after his accident, we get our car back. I drop him off, and the registration is missing from his car folder, so I run home to find it, and wait for him to meet me there.

By the time I get home, the baby is asleep and I decide to let her sleep. So I do what any good mom would do, and I lock my baby in the car. OK. I know what you're thinking, but it was 60 something out, and I cracked the windows, opened the bedroom blinds, because the car is literally right outside the window. As many of you know how paranoid I am, I run out to the car every two minutes to make sure she doesn't wake up and get upset.

I find the registration, and the phone rings. It's my hubby telling me I need to find the check book, because we used the last one last week. I tore the house up looking for the checks! I finally find them, lock the house and go back up the road to the dealership. I give him the check book and think, I still have a few minutes before the boys would be home, so I head out to a thrift shop.


Great! Today all books $.50! I head over to the books, talking to my little baby on the way, and “smoosh”! I step right into squishy wet carpet! I look down and the entire carpet is soaked in water, I follow the water to the source, THE MEN'S BATHROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's on my shoes!!! I wear those through my front door! My baby crawls around on the floor!! Ew!! One reason we don't wear our shoes in the house. YUCK! They should at least put up a sign! “Enter at Your Own Risk! Cling-Ons are lurking!”

I come home a little while later, and who should sneak up and scare me half out of my men's-bathroom-toilet-water, soaked shoes, but my “adorable” little neighbor girl! I promptly explained that the boys weren't home, and she followed me in any way, continuing to ask me a million questions about where they were, why were they there, and “couldn't I just let them stay home today” all while pleasantly displaying the grated green pickle in her mouth, she'd been chomping on, and smacking her lips loudly.

By the time I got my bags in, carried my once again sleeping child into the house, the boys were back. I allow her to stay, because I know she is lonely, and she has a special place in my heart. So off to the video game they go to play, and I let them! I am exhausted. I sit down at the table to have a snack. The baby is still sleeping, and the kids are quiet for a few minutes. Sweet bliss! Two minutes into my Raisin Bran, I hear a strange bark outside my sliding glass door. I turn to see TWO pit bulls in my fenced in back yard!!! My poor border collie is cowering under the grill! I open the door just barely so he will come to me, and it was too late! They start attacking him! I am screaming at this point and pounding on the glass, my baby wakes up crying, and the kids run into the kitchen to fin their mom almost in tears, pounding on the glass, and their precious puppy being gnawed on by these monsters! I grab the phone and dial 911. I am in a panic and give the lady all the info about the situation. The dogs back off a little and start stiffing the tree, so I barely open the door and get my dog inside! He has blood on his fur, so of course I'm very upset, the 911 operator sends out a police officer. I check my dog all over, no wounds! Wow! The police officer goes next door, and they check the fence and can't find a single place where the dogs could've gotten in our yard. Their only guess is that the dogs JUMPED the fence! That's incredible! My KIDS could've been out there!! The neighbors say the dogs are someone else's and they will be gone immediately, as far as I know, they are gone. But My children could not get to sleep, because of what they had seen. My dog, is OK, thankfully, and I am so proud of him for standing his ground, he protected himself, and he earned my respect. He gets to sleep in the house from now on!

November 24th (posting late)

Well, I had a wonderful weekend, cleaning out the garage and organizing like a mad woman! But today I am So tired and my body can feel every bit of that work from this weekend. My head is pounding and my back hurts. I do feel my age! I decide, today we will do nothing, and just relax, and mommy will get some rest.

Friday, November 21, 2008

I Need a Medic!!

My boys are involved in a boyscout type of group, and today was my day to teach. I chose first aid, so we could earn that badge before we tackled hiking, camping POCKET KNIFE, or any of those other important badges that require you to know first aid, in case of an emergency.

I have to say the moms and dads that volunteer to help are so wonderful! And today I was so grateful for them! We started off great. I told them all about the Good Samaritan story Jesus told in the bible. I wanted them to understand how important helping each other is. I had them sit on the grass (making sure there were no ants first, this IS FL) in the sun to keep warm, since it was chilly today. Thinking I was being so thoughtful by doing this, I started to read. They all started to grumble about being hot. I continue to read, being moved myself by this Samaritan's generosity, when one of our boys gets bored and starts to "mow" the grass with his hands, flinging dry grass bits into all the other boy's eyes. Now, as many of you know, I have children with challenges, and I know first hand that boys can get distracted and become motivated to do such things, when pressed to sit too long. So I begin to read like the micro machine man (if you were old enough during the eighties, then you know this man) and continue to add in "OK, now we're going to have to use first aid right here if you don't quit throwing the grass around" and "sit still, we're going to have smashed fingers if you step on someone"

Finally after what felt like (I guess) to the boys, reading the entire New Testament, we head over to the tables to stencil a cross onto our first aid bags. Now mind you, I spent allot time prepping for this craft, (of course if you know me, then you know all the prep took place less than 24 hours prior, but it happened none the less) and I had all the stencils clipped to the bags ahead of time to save these boys from having to figure it out. By the time I finished handing out the bags, the first few boys were already trying to play with the clothes pins and clip them to their lips and each other! Time to get out the bright red ACRYLIC paint...

Most of the boys did really well! I was very proud of them, and the neatness was VERY unexpected! On to the first aid session. My wonderful parent helpers took the painted bags and moved them so they could dry. And we head over to the next station. I start to explain about bandaging and tourniquets, and one of the nursery moms come around the corner with my precious baby covered in slobber and sobbing. Ahhh separation anxiety. Gotta love it! Bless the mom's heart, she felt so terrible for my little bundle of slobbery sweetness. So what choice did I have, but to take her. But there was no one else to teach the class, so I continue, while holding my now, happy, drooly baby. (I wanted to use the strip of fabric to wipe her little face, and I would have too, had it not been attached to a little boy's arm! It is at this moment, that one of our little guys falls mouth first into the picnic table, and blood is oozing out of his lip and chin! (OK, truce! I honestly really don't know much about first aid, so I was like, "OK, we really can't put a band aid on that, so I guess we better get some ice and get his mom") It is also at this time, that I look over and all the paint covered First Aid bags are blowing off the tables on to the mulch covered ground.

I continue to show them how to wrap a limb and explain why it's important(you know, slow the blood flow and elevate the limb), and then let them all have a go at it. I really don't know what I was expecting, but I turn around and out of all these little boys, about 75% of them are trying to A-either wrap them around their partner's head, like a mummy, or B-wrap them around their own necks! My own son says, "hey mom, I'm stopping the blood flow!" as he has this thing twisted around his neck. (I am still holding the baby, by the way)

I direct them back to the field, to get some of this energy out, by doing a relay race. They were to wrap their team mate's arm and then bring them back (like the good Samaritan helped the poor guy on the road), and so on, until they finished. Thinking they all have this understood, I yell on your mark....etc.

I look over, I have team #1 ALL running to the other side, and team #2 trying to follow directions, or at least what they believed were the right directions. And the dad helping us is laughing along with myself and another mom. He says, "I don't think I even understand" It is at this moment that I realize my directions weren't clear, and didn't make any sense! Not even a little. I dismiss the boys to have free play, and it's immediately Lord of the Flies up in there! Arguing who's smarter and stronger. So "Back over the field!" I say. We play duck duck goose (big boy style, "super fast!" I say It was great, until my own son goes crashing into the ground face first. So Major headache for the rest of the day! "OK pudding for everyone!" I yell, and the screaming mob of minimen race back to the picnic tables. It is the best thing I could have done, to bring peace among the savages. (If any of you reading this, are a parent of one of these precious boys, I do apologize, please do not take offense! I truly love each one of these dear sweet children, but two of them ARE mine, and I know first hand how wild and um "energetic" boys can get!)

After ALL of this, it was so lovely to see these young men settle down, and begin to make cards and pack Christmas boxes for children in Haiti. I saw the care they put into each box, and I was proud.

As for me teaching, I'm not sure how much these little ones actually absorbed today, or how much I even got out there for them to grasp. Our first aid class was full of scrapes, bumps and even cuts, and not once did we get to dress the wounds or ice the bruises, but my prayer is the scripture we read will find a place in their hearts, and they will put into action the spirit of generosity.

After today, I don't think I will attempt the Pocket Knife badge!

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Unleashing the Inner Monster- A Transparent Me

I don't know why it is, but I have this ability to destroy some one's feelings or build them up with only a few words. I guess we all have that ability, but whether we choose to use that or not, is what sets us apart.

I read a little poem a while back about a mom who wouldn't dare speak a cross word to a stranger, but had no problem blurting out rude commands to her small child when she was frustrated. "Get back I'm working" "Don't touch that!" well any parent, mom or dad, has felt that frustration. And we all fall short at some point.

But I wonder why it is that we exercise such self control toward complete strangers, even when they wrong us, but when it comes to our family, the very ones who love us the most, we unleash the beast!

I was pouring over this subject in prayer last night, after everyone else in my home was asleep. Why am I so quick to condemn and find fault in the precious ones God has placed in my care. My kids AND my husband.

The Lord impressed upon me a scripture last week. Proverbs 14:1 The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish tears it down with her own hands. (NAS) At first I felt convicted by this, and wanted to search out ways to improve myself, in certain areas, one being, how I treat my loved ones. But after about two days, I became indignant! *I* do "this" and *I* do "that" why should *I* have to adjust or change anything else? I can't give any more! This is in fact a lie straight from the enemy, one I bought into very easily, because it gave me the "freedom" to give myself a break, and revert to selfpity.

Well, it has been five days since I've given over to this "old" way of thinking, and the Lord has shown me how selfish and destructive this can be! It has been the most miserable five days, I've been so self-absorbed. Have you ever heard the Mercy Me song "So Long Self"? I think we go through this several times in our lives, trying to rid of this ugly person we "used" to be, but just like that scraggly stinky old neighborhood stray cat, they keep coming back to aggravate those around them.

So how do we extract these sinful, selfish personalities from ourselves, when we are so used to them, and it seems that's all we've known? We learn to HATE them! When our hearts become in tune with the Lord, then those old ways are NOT all we know. They are just easier. And the truth is, I can't do anything I do in my own strength. When God gave me that verse, what He wanted me to see, was this..

He made me, all of us, with a deficiency, a need to fill ourselves with Him. And when we don't, we DO become depleted and weakened. Then we go into survival mode, which means, "me first", and our old spirit of selfish rebellion comes back. We begin to ask why God would put such a load on us, and not make us capable to handle it. But, when we give ourselves over, and allow His words to enrich us, and His Spirit to envelope us, we become ALIVE, and able to handle ALL things, through His strength.

We are not to say a prayer, and give ourselves once to God, no more than we can say "I do" and commit to our spouse once at the altar. It is a daily choice!